Holidays

Now there is a subject, I wonder if I can explain exactly how I feel about the holidays…

First you have Halloween – plastic costumes everywhere of whatever character happens to be “trending” that year. This year I expect you were visited by at least one tiny Pikachu or Spiderman.

For the adults it’s about finding that perfect character that explains their political views, or, gets them laid; whichever is their priority at the time. (So many Harley Quinns  – you’d think that being a woman tortured by her lover until she becomes unhinged and violent were the ideal.) Then there are the businesses that didn’t get the memo that Holiday decorations in October are really only more pressure that their customers could do without.

Next comes Thanksgiving – a holiday that somehow became more about football, how many pies one can put away, and what your game plan is for Black Friday – than it is about being truly thankful and reflective of those things that made you feel that way.

Christmas/Kwanzaa/Hanukah/Yule (whatever it is that floats your particular boat) is a tougher one. Having spent more than twenty five years in retail, mine is a particularly skewed view.

What originally started as a celebration of life, of laughing in the face of winter, of the bounty that was harvested from past year, and looking toward the coming one with joy and hope; has turned into a way of putting businesses into the black by putting oneself into debt for the next year – at least – does a new Play Station really equal love ?

Lastly there is New Year’s Eve – the great “qualifier” – if one is truly deserving of love, then you will have someone to kiss at midnight… right? If you truly do pull off your resolution, then you really are a good person… correct?

How did this day become less about reflection of lessons learned and the new opportunities that lie ahead and more about one’s ego and self esteem?

All this being said – Dressing up the house to scare the kids, but not so much that they won’t come to the door. is MY treat,  Thanksgiving is oft times the only chance in a busy year  to spend with friends and family, and bringing a smile to someone’s face with that perfect little something that I found in that hole-in-the-wall shop in June – always warms my heart.

The spirit of the season is the reflection of all those little things that happened during the year that made life worthwhile.

I look forward to the new year with anticipation and hope.

My current creative outlet…

…has not been words as much of late; though I have many tripping over themselves to get out, they have not been… concise  – scribbles, doodles, and the like – but nothing put together in a coherent whole. Not to worry, it has always been that way with me; several things, projects, games, toys, strewn about me, looking haphazard… not so – and there is now no one to tell me to pick up after myself, except one of the other MEs 🙂  but Me is currently busy with something else and is being lenient.

This is what has currently been occupying my time:

Untitled

So I have not completely disappeared, just had my head down, and now that I have looked up to say hi – HI! – I need to go paint my bathroom. LOL

KJ

If you are interested in any of these they are available at my online store:

Dark Djinn’s Tie Dye Nirvana

Have a day of the awesome!

Finally – got it done & published…

websites take – for – freakin – ever – when you don’t have time – and – would really rather have enough money to pay someone else to do it – knowhatimean?

anyhootie – it’s up – click it:

Decided to dust off an old one

This is something I wrote after a comment made about considering me as part of that persons future. It’s one of my favorites.
As with most of my prose it’s meant to be read aloud;

…been lost in my darkness … so long…
belief suspended
… insular

and there you were

… I step out into the light … blinking
spring … smell of rain
…………………………. so …
clean

you …
considering
… me

seems a foreign concept
……….. a long lost memory

so … a change

suspension of disbelief
sur-reality of …… someone
who may fit me

considering …
…………….. consideration …
……………………………… consider it
… so …

I breathe you in …
…drink you …
……………. like water

moving …
…………. movement …
……………………. forward motion

what is it I’m thinking

(deep breath)

I want to
…. run with you …
…… play with you …
…………………… be …
within you

you feel like … home

read my past words …
I reference what …
……………………….. calls …

you are like the silver dusk …
that … place … on the horizon
………………………………… that pulls
I’ve been searching for that … feeling

of ………………….. anticipation …

so strong

……………. like
………………….. that
……………………….. moment
……………………………………. before
… orgasm …

I feel this in you

if you want me …
……………………what I am
……………………………..what I will be
I can be … anywhere

the chance to grow with you
…………………….. learn who you are …
…………………………….. experience …
you

these things I don’t want to miss

I may have found one of my kind
……………………………… rare …
……………………….. and so many years between

your voice …
your eyes …
the way you walk …
……………….dip your head …
……………………………………smile

these things I don’t want to miss

this … warmth … you’ve inspired in me
so like the things I … yearn … for
so long …
………………it’s beyond memory

just being … you
has me … forgetting … to build
that wall

… so quick …
…………. so ……. fast …

to be …
…friends
… companions
… lovers

it does not matter … where
… it only matters …
………………………. that it’s so

you have become … dear

you are in …
…………….. you are …

my heart

© KJ Miller 2004

Putting my money where my mouth is

Recently I put some money toward the Kickstarter project – Andrej(A) – a documentary that still needs a bit more funding to be completed.

When I got the follow-up email asking me for a comment on why I backed this project I didn’t quite know what to say, not because there were no words, but because there were too many. I have lived a bit more than fifty years and have experienced quite a lot leading me to the why of this.

So, as usual for me, I have to sort it on paper. Lot’s of scribbles notes as I think it through.

First off, let me state that I have never seen Andreja as male or female. I have seen photos and watched videos and I see a feminine person – let me be clear – I did not see an effeminate man, I saw a feminine person. “Andrej” was androgynous to be sure, but more to the feminine than masculine in my mind.

I still see the same thing now. Andreja is Andreja.

When I would say something about Andreja to others I would be hard pressed to say he or she so I would use Andrej or use them or they since English has no real neutral pronouns. Also I never thought of Andreja as gay or straight – more as… undefined.

I believe the first time I saw Andreja, was a photo by Damon Baker, who I had just discovered a short time prior, He does beautiful work. The photo was a person with a slightly guarded expression that drew me in and made me wonder who this person was… and Andreja has been dragging me along ever since. (Damon too LOL)

Andrej Pejic by Damon Baker

Andrej Pejic by Damon Baker

When Andreja announced full transition I was not surprised. Being an observer (artist) and a pretty good detective, I had a suspicion that Andreja was more than just androgynous from the beginning. Then I saw a photo by Mario Sorrenti and I knew she was going to fully transition.

Andrej Pejic by Mario Sorrenti

Andrej Pejic by Mario Sorrenti

A relaxing “vacation” and a change in hair color later… I knew she had done it…

…then she announced – I love it when I’m right. 🙂

so…

Why do I feel it necessary to back this documentary?

Because I rarely wear a dress, or even “feminine” clothes, I wear makeup sometimes, when I feel like it, I speak how I want, act as I want, I myself, treat others with dignity and respect, so expect nothing less in return … I like me. Not everyone is so lucky.

Because we are not clones; humans physical, emotional, and mental sexuality, are separate entities not controlled by one, or even three toggle switches, but by separate sliding scales that are only part of other sliding scales that make up each individual PERSON. Humans are infinitely, beautifully FLUID.

Because who we are, is not grounded in biology, or psychology, or theology, sociology or any “-ology” It is any and all of those, to varying degrees in each of us, and therefore impossible to define what makes each human an individual.

Because everyone deserves to feel comfortable in their own skin; because we have all felt that moment when the person we “see” in the mirror and the person we “feel” when we close our eyes doesn’t match. Imagine that feeling never going away. That’s Gender Dysphoria.

Because I felt a twinge of disappointment; still. Even with everything I believe. That annoyed me because it tells me that what I was taught as a child is so ingrained that it’s difficult to remove even knowing that teaching is wrong. So we need to change as a society so future generations don’t ever feel that disappointment.

Because I felt sad; that she had to surgically alter her body to feel like herself, that she would have to take estrogen to remain that way, and that she would have to deal with the ignorance, intolerance, and suspicion of others towards the transgendered.

Because current society is still skewed to strip humans of their individuality and place them in a nice “comfort zone” box in order to be accepted. From boys not being able to wear a color that’s too “feminine” to … well we all know how horrible people can act when they fear “otherness”.

Because it shouldn’t be necessary – but it is – nor should it be remarkable or exceptional or surprising – but it is – and because it is still all those things I feel the need to back this, and others like it, should I have the ability to do so.

Because Andreja is a breathtakingly beautiful soul that , finally, got the skin she can feel comfortable enough in to move on to the next thing, which is –  partly – educating others on why this is necessary. As tor the rest… well , I’m sure she’ll make it beautiful to see.

Because – well  – an excerpt from a letter to someone who asked for my take on sexuality, 2/3 years ago, because of some of their own questioning:

“There is no higher power dictating what is right or wrong in my world – I decide for myself. You may believe in it, but I feel that what is written in the book you base it on is at odds with what is natural in the human condition. It’s at odds with other beliefs. The book’s surrounding environment leads people to believe they are better than other humans who don’t believe what’s in that book. The book itself has words of judgment of those that do not choose to live by its standards. That, in and of itself, makes the book wrong, in my eyes.
I don’t believe in judging others. The only things I don’t abide are those that choose to treat others without dignity and respect. The way I show my disappointment in others is to exclude them from my world. I think we decide for ourselves whether or not to lie, cheat, steal, or kill. There is nothing outside our own choices persuading us to do wrong, or brow beating us to do right. We make choices based on experience, self-esteem, and ego. Our choices show in the world we create.

My belief is that you need to open yourself to life. All of it. What if today was your only day, how would you choose to live it? No second chances, no do-over, no reincarnation, no heaven. Just now.
I choose to live with my eyes open, facing forward, arms held wide, ready to embrace what comes next. Unafraid of the consequences, because there are ALWAYS consequences, no matter the choice.
If your Father is as you seem to believe him to be – Love – then he already knows and accepts you – as is. If he is, as the hate mongers believe him to be, you’re already done for… so what do you have to lose?
If you didn’t have to worry about anyone or anything, what would you want? What would you ask for? NOW is your chance, NOW is your choice, It’s … always … NOW. That’s how I live.

If you wan’t to help out there is still a couple days left – and every dollar helps – go to:

Andrej(A) – The Kickstarter Backed Documentary

So – in the event of a shit/fan scenario…

what do YOU do?

Me I get real calm – on the outside at least – and start cleaning it up,
calming other people down,
and generally getting no rest

until it’s back to some semblance of normal

then I fall apart
get shaky exhausted
drink a glass of wine… or three…… or tequila
sleep

Currently the shit involves my ex-boyfriend/best friend/work partner

this guy

312209_176429135771284_1920950289_n

he’s sitting in a hospital bed

car accident
500 miles away
after just getting his car fixed to make the trip
for a job
and now he won’t be able to work

because body broken
because car broken
because work tools broken… gone … spread out all over a California road

and I am annoyed with him

for being so stupid
for being soft-hearted
for incorrect packing
for over correcting

because I woulda…

but

woulda/shoulda/coulda … can go fuck off

that he is sometimes stupid
that he is soft-hearted
that he is bad at organizing
that he wants to save that animal

are the reasons why I love him

and why he is my best friend

KJ Miller 9/24/2014

if you want to help Ralph get back some of what he lost, please go > here < to donate

Learning how to change your mind

I just watched a TED talk that put me in mind of something I wrote several years ago:

Fear Profits Man Nothing

Worrying about “what may be” tomorrow only ruins “what is” today.

I think about life like I do my art; there are no lines, there is no black and white, there really isn’t even gray. All we have is color, light and shadow. Shades, tones, hues – that’s it. There is too much diversity in this world, too many choices, made by you, made by others, for there to be any absolutes, anything we can take for granted.

Assuming something to be the truth, taking it as granted is futile; the future is not given. Sure there are likelihoods,  some probabilities among the endless possibilities, but how often have each of us thought of something as ‘a given’, and been shocked by that whatever doing a 180 and throwing all our carefully laid plans into chaos?

Tomorrow doesn’t exist.

How many people will die today? It sure doesn’t exist for them. Are you so sure your not one of them? It MAY exist for us, but in what form? Who made a choice that will affect your world directly? And do you even know them? You don’t have any idea of what possibilities even exist in that case.

Yesterday is only a memory.

Joys, sorrows, choices made, lessons learned, and it’s gone. It prepared you for today. NOW. And maybe – if your lucky – the dream of tomorrow.This is all any of us get.

Some say to live each day as though it’s your last.

Living as though today is your last is too stressful, with all the things that haven’t been done, or said, or even thought of, hanging over your head, you just can’t make up for it all. Live today as if it’s your first day – maybe your only day – because regrets are for sissies. You only have them if you don’t like who you are now. Just by trying to do your best each day, saying only the things you mean, then what is there to regret?

We don’t know anyone else’s reasons, motivations, or dreams. So we can’t assume. We can’t speak for anyone else. Remember that our choices to say, do, act on, or react to, are our own. They are our responsibility, because the only person anyone can ever truly know is oneself.

And that is a lifetime’s journey.

The TED talk if you are interested;

So I went to my first Warped Tour…

My previous experiences with music festivals have not always been the best; my first being when I was still in high school. My uncle, bless him, wanted to do something for his other niece, who was undergoing treatment for cancer, to lift her spirits. I was around the same age and gender, so of course I was the logical choice to go, since all she had were brothers. I was never much interested in hanging out with girls, them being, for the most part, too… girly, but being that it was for a good cause, I did my best to act like I was interested and went.

It was KHJ Radio’s Cavalcade of Stars, which amounted to a bunch of top 40 radio acts which included; Jermaine Jackson, Shaun Cassidy, and Debby Boone. I’m sure you can imagine how painful this was for someone whose favorite bands were Queen, Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin, and KISS.

The one bright spot had been a sudden appearance of Parker Stevenson, who had been hanging out backstage. Shaun had the audience chant for him to come out, and, since I thought he was hot, I did. Years later when Kirstie Alley confirmed my suspicion of his, uh… endowment, I felt vindicated of acting the fool.

My second music festival was Peace Sunday at the Rose Bowl. It was a group, of about 85,000, there to rally for nuclear disarmament. Everyone got a program and a small light blue ribbon signify giving Peace a chance. I was mostly going because I had heard Stevie Nicks was going to be there.

peacesunday19822dd

The lineup:

Gil Scott Heron, Jesse Colin Young, Graham Nash, Bonnie Raitt, Donovan, Timothy B. Schmidt, Don Felder, Crosby, Stills & Nash, Steven Stills, Taj Mahal, Stevie Wonder, Joan Baez, Bob Dylan, Dan Fogelberg, Stevie Nicks, Linda Ronstadt, Nicolette Larson, Bette Midler, Jackson Browne, Gary U. S. Bonds, Tom Petty.

So we were on the road around 5 am so we could line up to get in close, doors opening at about 8am. Armed with munchies and drinks, a blanket, sunglasses, etc. we made it onto the field, about a third back from the stage. At this point I must tell you that, I was informed on the drive over, by my boyfriend, that he had inadvertently purchased tickets to Santana (his favorite) for that evening. What? I told him he was an idiot, and said, if PS was over by then, we would go. It became obvious around Stevie Wonder that it would not end soon enough, and at about Joan and Bob, an argument ensued. I relented because, he really was an idiot, and I hate arguing, so we left at about Dan Fogelberg… sigh.

To add insult to injury I went to the Greek Theater in grass-stained pants and my boyfriend’s T-shirt over my bikini and sunburn, with flip-flops on my dirty feet, and hat hair. I did not speak to him the rest of the evening. Santana was okay from what I remember; though I did spend some time in the bathroom taking a paper towel bath. I saw Santana again a few years ago, and, if you ever get the chance, I recommend that you go, he IS great.

About a year later my boyfriend had a chance to make up the whole two-concerts-in-one-day debacle with the second (and last) US Festival. His plan was for us to go the 3rd day so we could see Stevie Nicks. We went with his uncle, and uncle’s friend, who were paraplegics, so we would see the concert from one of the platforms, set up for the disabled, as their plus ones. We stayed at the friend’s house as it was the nearest to the concert, because doors opened at about 6am. The house was on a hill, close enough to the venue that, we could tell what songs were being played (2nd day) by Van Halen – at 3am… At 5am we were in the car headed down to the concert.

Steve-Wozniaks-US-Festival1

The lineup:

Los Lobos (side stage), Little Steven & The Disciples of Soul, Berlin, Quarterflash, U2, Missing Persons, The Pretenders, Joe Walsh, Stevie Nicks, David Bowie

Now it may look like there aren’t that many on the bill, but they all played full concerts. When you add break down and set up, it makes for one very long day. I didn’t go to Los Lobos and could barely hear them. I do remember Little Steven, though I was in a bit of a haze. Berlin I was drifting more, and by Quarterflash, I was down for a nap. I remember, waking at one point, wishing someone would shove that sax down her throat, before drifting off again.

Then came a little known band (in the U.S.) called U2 and I thought, “they are gonna be huge” (bought their album that week). We made a foray, down into the crowd, to check out the booths during Missing Persons (not a fan). Muddy people everywhere, from being sprayed with water guns, to stave off the heat. Smelly too, many had been living in a tent or van for three days – 670,000 people… luckily the porta-johns were close so I did not have to do that again.

We were able to tell when the acts were about to go on, because they would bring them in by helicopter, so we were wondering why it took so long for Joe Walsh to come out… they were trying to sober him up. It was a really, really bad set. Stevie Nicks came out around 11ish and I was starting to shiver from the temperature drop, and by the time Bowie started with China Girl at 2am I was shivering uncontrollably. So we gathered our stuff and listened to him as we walked the mile to our vehicle, I was finally able to get reacquainted with my pillow at about 4am.

Hopefully this illustrates why, even though I love music, (an extremely broad range of music, it is one of my greatest inspirations, as a writer of prose and, as an artist) I have been reluctant to go to another “music festival”. Don’t get me wrong, I have been to other types of festivals which music was part of, but not one devoted to, since 1983. The most bands at one time since then, has been 4 or 5, but in concert, at a bar, club, etc., lots of that type, it’s so much easier to take.

I have a tendency of going to things for one band and if I hear another good band there, it’s a bonus. The last time I went to Faerieworlds (last year) was to see Omnia’s first foray to the States – thanks to Lynsye (ticket) and Tracy (ride and company) I had a great time, it was Of the Awesome. They are back at this year’s Faerieworlds July 25th and 26th so if you have a chance, it’s worth the trip.

So…

This time I went, to Van’s Warped Tour, for One OK Rock, a band from Japan. I waited until the day before to buy my ticket because, if it was pouring rain or a heat wave, (PacNW) I wanted to be prepared for the former, and skip it, if the latter. I got there at about 20 minutes before (doors open) 10am.

Being familiar with the venue, I had skipped the entrance and went the back way (missing the, hour-wait-at-the-light-only-to-be-told-there-was-no-more-room-so-go-to-the-speedway-and-take-the-shuttle-back, that other people had to deal with) was surprised there was still space left in expo parking, surprised again that it was free if you already had your ticket, I did, so I also skipped the very long will call/purchase line, went directly to the entrance line, which was moving fairly quickly. It pays to have experience, will-call people had to wait twice. I had my bag searched, but I wasn’t patted down, and I was in.

My first stop was to buy a schedule for band times, cursed myself for forgetting my list of bands I thought would be interesting, and which to avoid completely, but since I had written them down I did recall the majority. I noted where the water was, should I run out, congratulated myself for getting cash the day before, when I saw the line at the ATM, and went to find a Honey Bucket. Long drives, long lines, and coffee do not mix.

Refreshed, I took a couple minutes to peruse the schedule and mark off the times for the bands I remembered (damn me again) found that most were in the 1pm to 4pm range, so there would be some conflicts, (not a problem if I were into a smaller range of styles, but…) and I made note that One OK Rock was at 1:45, meaning I was free to roam a bit. So, I set off into the maze. I chuckled to myself at some of the looks I was getting, I wore clothes that were in my comfort zone, a superhero tee, my old paint spattered camos, and converse (with insoles – a must), so, kinda in the norm but, a nearly 6 ft tall woman in a beat-up straw cowboy hat with a tie dye band? Not so much. LOL

I wandered around getting my bearings. There were 11 areas for music – 9 stages, 1 extra large; Monster, 2 large; Kia Soul & Electric Soul, 2 medium; Warheads & Journeys, 3 smaller, though varied; Ernie Ball, Hard Rock & Beatport, 1 tent for acoustic, and 1 open area that seemed to be mostly Rap, The stages were set up the same direction, so as not to compete for sound (too much), band tents were near the stage they were playing, sponsor tents and food were in the center acting as a baffle, and semi trailers, that housed equipment, were behind or to the side of the stage, also serving that purpose. Walking back and forth between different areas the sounds were audible and mixed, but, when you turned the corner, one would fade almost completely. Stages set next to each other were timed, one would end, and the next begin, as breakdown commenced. There was always music.

Another thing I noticed was the lack of negative vibes. Seriously, I didn’t see one fight or even a loud argument. There were many cops around, but I looked as though they were having an uneventful day.

I wasn’t sure at the outset if I would last the entire day, because, One; being 30 years older and a whole day was a lot back then, and Two; going alone, with an hour drive each way to ad time to the day. I honestly tried to last. It was just before 5 pm, when my body said “It is time” Sigh. The last band was scheduled for 7:45, so, disappointing yes, but, when the body says it’s time to go, and there’s still an hour drive ahead, you leave.  I may go again, but next time I will train for it, like a marathon, to have more stamina. Knowing band order in advance would be nice, but the tour is set up to decide order of bands the morning of, so I’ll have to be prepared for a 12 to 14 hour day, mostly on my feet, in the heat or rain. It was, however, a well spent 50 bucks.

Because they made me smile, which I am wont to do in the presence of good music, my picks for bands to check out (of those I got to see) are:

Beebs and her Money Makers; Rock/ Ska – like Oingo Boing, No Doubt, and The English Beat got tossed in a blender. Fun stuff – very danceable.

Bad Rabbits; R&B, Rock and a little Funk tossed in for seasoning – Front man Dua is on the ball, keeps the audience going, and his voice ain’t bad either – smooth and rich with a good range.

We The Kings; Alt/Rock –  this band reminded me of Collective Soul in many ways… they don’t sound alike, but their “presence” feels the same – to me anyway. You may have heard this one.

Breathe Carolina; Pop/Electronica – bouncy, danceable, energizing.

And of course – One OK Rock – a blend of influences including Rock, Punk, Metal, and Emo, they are high energy, very high. Toru, Ryota, and Tomoya are excellent musicians, and Taka has the voice to pull it all off. They are Totally Of the Awesome, and totally worth the necessity of 9 hours of sleep (my normal is 6) and my new farmer tan – check ‘em out.

I checked out vids on youtube before I went, so of the bands I didn’t see, whether from schedule conflicts and leaving early, I’d recommend these (link opens new tab/window):

Plague Vendor (punk) http://youtu.be/Hh9yZWeTmVM

Falling in Reverse (hardcore) http://youtu.be/rgWr2nln83s

Icon for Hire (pop/rock) http://youtu.be/e_S9VvJM1PI

Close Your Eyes (pop punk/hardcore) http://youtu.be/Rh3ZJxgHCe8

The City Shake Up (rock/punk) http://youtu.be/waJfjzithaQ

We Are the In Crowd (pop punk/rock) http://youtu.be/BFqtasnu7y8

Nick Santino (indie/acoustic) http://youtu.be/DY17eq2JyY0

A Skylit Drive (rock/hardcore) http://youtu.be/DHAy8QBTlTA

Honorable mentions from live and video:

Echosmith(indie/Alt), Issues (Metal), Terror (hardcore), For All Those Sleeping (metal/rock), Mixtapes (punk/indie), Ghost Town (rock/electronic), Dangerkids (rock/hip-hop), Teenage Bottlerocket (pop/punk), Elder Brother (indie/rock/acoustic), This Wild Life (acoustic/pop), Nit Grit (electronica), Antiserum (electronic/hip-hop), The Protomen (rock/opera), The Word Alive (metal/core), and Young Statues (rock/indie/acoustic).

If the bands aren’t here its not necessarily because I didn’t think they were good, it is more often than not, because I thought they were, for the most part, interchangeable with other bands, or poor at either videos or live. If they were bad at both, well, maybe they were having a bad day, both times.

Hopefully I’ve shared a band that’ll be your new favorite – or at least make you smile.

Living Clean

My mother died in February and, for reasons too numerous to go into, I didn’t mourn. However I did reflect on her life and where she ended up; having very few physical things but, having a terribly heavy burden of unresolved, and horribly bulky, crap cluttering her heart…

My tendency is to not carry around a lot of stuff, big, small, inside of me, outside… Too much stuff and nonsense clogs you up, stifles your chi, and ends up owning you, rather than the other way around. The hardest part is examining one’s reasons for not letting go – most of which are lies we told ourselves…

Paring down…

What is it that you
…carry ’round?

What
… weighs on you 
… preys on you

You feel it fills you up

but it just becomes

something to
… get around
… move around

Obstacles to a
life that’s clean … free of waste

Hard to taste
true flavor 
when there’s

… so much

… excess

… baggage …

Something I wrote a few years back. 
I have removed so many things from my life over the years. Peeling off the onion layers of collected crap – I was always good at organizing my stuff, so that everything had a place, but after moving into smaller and smaller places over the years, I found I don’t need, or miss, any of it. I have told people often; if you don’t love it enough to display it, or use it enough to keep it in good condition and always know where it is, remove it from your life – It was probably meant for someone else and you delayed it finding it’s true home. Let it go.

This also applies to what’s inside you. Do you love it enough to be grateful for it? Is it useful enough to you that it works well in moving your life forward? If not it delays you finding your true home. Let it go.

Memory and Dream

topic came up today that put me in mind something I wrote a few years ago...

There is no future
It exists only
… in hope
… in dreams
… in faith

Built on lessons
learned yesterday
that made us
strong enough
to live through
this ‘today’

We look longingly
to the horizon
watching the sun set
then turn away
to look for
the next rising sun

With yesterday
always chasing
and tomorrow
pulling us forward
what happens to
the stillness of the now

… do we ever ‘feel’ today?

© KJ Miller